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Eat your heart out. Fake Dates with Kevin & Jessica. The Wild Cow

The Wild Cow 1896 Eastland Ave. Nashville, TN 37206 (615) 262-2717 Kevin: After spending winter break agonizing over my decision of who to pick as my new fake date, I finally settled on this girl who sang me a song of foodie devotion; her name is Jessica Wardwell.

Jessica: My plan worked. I knew Kevin would fall for my song and I was thrilled. I was a little nervous about our first date though. He picked me up at 7 p.m. and told me we were going to a vegan restaurant.

Kevin: I hoped that she wouldn’t be offended by my choice of restaurants, but after Cassidy broke my heart, I felt I needed a fresh start. That meant changing my whole diet to cut out animal products. After all, vegetables never broke my heart. When we got to the Wild Cow, we were greeted by lots of tables and pictures of happy animals on the walls.

Jessica: We chose our spot in the corner and grabbed a menu. I didn’t know Kevin too well, but the indie house music filled the silence of our awkward first-date conversations. The menu was also a good talking point. Kevin wanted to order the queso, but I was a little frightened of “vegan cheese.” Kevin: I was little nervous to order the vegan queso, but I was craving cheese anyway, so I had to have it. Jessica kept giving me weird looks as I got ready to take my first bite, and she blurted out “How is it?” as soon as the chip entered my mouth. Surprisingly, it tasted like the real thing. This is just one more piece of evidence that God is real.

Jessica: The appetizer was small, but it was enough to hold us over until our meals arrived. I was starving, but I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of Kevin. The veggie burger was pretty big, so I took off the top bun and cut it up to avoid a messy face. But Kevin still thought I was weird. I slowly ate and tried to get a conversation going while he scarfed down his tacos. Boys will be boys. Kevin: As I was devouring some of the most delicious tacos I had ever had, Jessica was sitting there slowly eating her burger. She seemed to be enjoying it, but it was just weird how slow she was eating. I think she might have been nervous, so we just talked about the different vegan hipsters that were in this joint. On a side note, they sell a four-song EP on vinyl for $1 to benefit some animal related charity. Sadly though, neither one of us has a record player, so we skipped buying it. Jessica: I just eat really slowly, OK? I really did love the burger, topped with sprouts and avocado. You could see all of the vegetables inside, which makes me think it is actually healthy for you. I definitely branched out by ordering a side of brussels sprouts, but as soon as I took a bite, I knew I had made the right decision. Then I realized my little side dish could win Kevin over during this date. So I offered him a bite.

Kevin: I HATE brussels sprouts. First of all, they’re named after the capital of a country known for their chocolate; it makes no sense. Second, they just look gross; like green orbs of death just waiting to kill me with their gross taste. After I tasted the ones here however, I’ll have to give the little demons a second chance. They were surprisingly good.

Jessica: He loved them. I knew it! I just hoped he was as impressed with me as he was with the brussels sprouts. Kevin: Turns out, the brussels sprouts weren’t the only thing I ended up liking that I didn’t think I would. Hopefully, she’ll be willing to go somewhere else with me next month, and we can do this whole thing all over again.

Overall, we think The Wild Cow is a tasty and cheap way to eat vegan or vegetarian, but meat-eaters will enjoy the place too; it’s a good change of pace. The ambiance is laid back enough that it doesn’t seem presumptuous about romance, but instead makes you feel at home. It’s also an easy way to say to that special someone “Hey, I don’t eat meat because I really care about animals.”

We’re here to sacrifice our taste buds for your dating desires, because we all know that the only way to your heart is through your stomach. Have an idea for somewhere you’d like us to scope out? Send us an email at

Our Picks: Kevin: Chips & Queso, Sweet Potato Tacos and a Chocolate-Peanut Butter Brownie Jessica: California Style Veggie Burger with Garlic-Balsamic Brussels Sprouts

Our Rating: 2 Ms. Tonyas 1 heart

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