The Battle of the Bruins talent show is a very humbling experience for an athlete.
When we step out on the pitch, court or track, we feel confident in our ability to perform.
However, when we step onto the stage, that confidence flies out the window.
At the fourth annual event, we saw men’s soccer players and baseball players in dresses, men’s track runners twerking their hearts out and men’s tennis players in bikinis.
Needless to say, the night got pretty interesting.
To start, a judge accused the women’s soccer team of being on a strict daily regimen of cocaine.
As a member of that team, I’ll gladly set the record straight and say his statement is not true.
Sorry, everyone.
In addition to that lovely comment, the event was also a little questionable and inappropriate.
An example includes when men’s soccer performed a spoof of, “Fifty Shades of Grey,” and when we saw a little too much skin from some of the men’s track and tennis players.
There’s quite the double standard when it comes to the performances.
I had fun dancing around, fully clothed and covered in a Lego costume, and the crowd seemed to like it; however, the crowd responded best to boys in bikinis and tight spandex shorts.
Every act has to be approved by the athletic department, and I can guarantee if our team were to show up to dress rehearsals wearing skin-tight outfits and proceeded to turn around and shake our butts, we would not have received approval.
I understand the guys aren’t really showing much off by wearing a bikini top as compared to a woman, but neither team should be able to do it.
If boys dress as girls, it’s hilarious, but if girls dress as boys, it’s not nearly as funny.
In the event’s four years, an all-female team has never won.
This is not to say that the women’s teams aren’t as talented as the men’s, but the second year the baseball team won while dressing as women. The third year, the men’s track team won by twerking in spandex. This past year, the tennis team won with the men wearing bikinis.
I’m not bitter because our team hasn’t won, because after all, the event is to benefit Special Olympics and it is something I look forward to every year. I just wish there was a way to level the playing field.
In the end, hearing the Special Olympians sing, “That’s What Makes Me Special,” and dancing along side them on stage makes everything worth it.
Also, for the record, I thoroughly enjoyed all of the winners’ acts the past three years. I can appreciate some quality twerking.
Despite all the controversy, at the end of the show each year, I am reminded of one important thing.
I should stick to soccer.
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