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OPINION: Who’s up for a trip to Mars?

Who’s up for a trip to Mars?

In reality, the odds of a 21-­year-­old college student like myself actually going to Mars are probably pretty slim, but at least now I have a chance.

NASA announced that it is going to have an open application period for future astronauts giving some lucky commoner a chance to fly past asteroids or even land on the Red Planet.

So obviously, I’m going to apply.

I don’t have the any of the college degrees that it asks for per se, but I’m sure NASA could use some regular, non­scientific people as well. Having the title of “First Journalist on Mars” would be an interesting one to put on my resume.

Typically, it seems to take about 200 days to get to Mars, according to Space.com, and a manned shuttle may take even longer, so entertainment is a must. I’m already planning on ways to kill the time before reaching our new planet. For example, practical jokes will likely play a large part.

“Uhh, Houston, we have a problem.”

“What’s the problem Mars One?”

“ALIENS. SO MANY ALIENS.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALIENS.”

“Tricked you. There are no aliens yet, it’s just a really dark and boring ride. I’ve been looking at the same star for weeks now.”

Don’t tell NASA about that one, I don’t want “Houston” to be in on it.

I do have some hurdles to jump before I ever get the chance to go to Mars, with my current, mediocre fitness regimen being the largest. Just in case I get that extremely unlikely call from NASA informing me I am to become the first journalist on Mars, I have decided to train like an astronaut. That may turn out to be rather interesting in itself.

According to NASA, it is essentially mandatory for astronauts to have a solid core, so the goal is to be able to do at least a dozen pushups before NASA brings me in for testing. Maybe I will even be able to muster out a sit­up or two.

Once I’m in the same shape as an astronaut, I should be ready for my trip into the void of outer space.

I just hope the Wi­Fi isn’t too slow.

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